*

made a vid but it won't post. .

7 months sober. today . and

i am as depressed as i ever was. unbelievable considering my beautiful surroundings. and the new job is a nitemare. well, i have to go already and i doubt i will get my own ip this winter. must save for vehicle. i'll probably get killed on one of these curvy 1lane roads. people drive them like speed demons. thanks for the visit.

2 pics of my other gnome.. & another post of sparklehorse - the best version

folder g - good thing i didn't say, 'come live with me & be my love'.

i may post a Trachtentanz next. no time to post the bluerun pics. < note to self

.rain. from my tungsten line of toppling ..

self-portrait

what do you want to do with the game in progress?

don't save
'invalid_ move'
what?!
stupidstupid spider solitaire
Nina stares at the screen
annoyed and just
pissed off -
this
no internet situation
blows !
outside bolts of lightning
frag ment the night's sky
the moon-fish swim in circles
turning every now & then to
press
their
frail
white
faces
AgainstTheGlass

***

later
in a dream
she follows pale_violet_links
to Mr Virtual Virtuoso's realm of 'No reason to stay awake'
obsolete electronics mementoes of another time
networks of amorphous alumni mannequins ~
their gushy eyes
music
machines
unfinished paintings<>drawings
maps & manuscripts

a blacklight poster of a naked asian chick
pinned to a marred wall
&
on the sofa a box of

open
to
be smeared
in the newer portals of the
multifarious Never Ending ~
Emptiness sometimes lies down and stretches her long legs
until her toes touch the tip of a bed or blanket or the
coat of some unsuspecting fool
silently shuffling through his own dream / s
of
long ago ~
clusters of rosettes wet and shiny could be found
clustering under certain trees at the edge of the wood ~
a myraid of spider webs strewn across
flowering meadows only visible to the human eye
on misty mornings ~

your absence is still a hole in today

*
Nina knows he is right ~ nothing will ever come of it
~ * ~
Nothing ~ slinky in her black dress & new
eyelashes Nothing ~ sister to Emptiness Nothing ~
penetrating the divine with one single swipe and click
the simple hit and run the clinch & glitch
Nothing ~ c ode les s just a slip in the chip

sometimes Nina thinks she somehow misled him but
the truth is he misled her or they misled each other
without ever working up

a sheen of sweat

during the overshadowing the static
the marathon marauding her alcoholic
psychosis his designer drugs & those
many melancholy drizzles
he rocked her and she cradled him
~*~



after the rain the blue starts to open out and
s p r e a d
blueing everything

'There are no more possible moves
What do you want to do?
end game
or
return and try again'

pics & music - one step beyond - realize - Karsh Kale

hello, my patchouli.ed, ethereal-enchantment.my emerald

.symphony, Hello!

I have to walk a mile to connect to your realm. cuz I live here, now -





Face Hook is like a city, too crowded & busy. I only go when I get a personal message.

moonshadow - cat stevens

thursday aug 11

a m


The Idyllic Routine

Bad verses; tokens of my affection
written while drinking mineral water
as deer gambole across the lawn

where are you? still nestled deep within a dream?

... and when the tempest shakes the wave
:) i was stringing patterns of rain into a
necklace just for you, my flame-stitch ...

*yellow*coldplay*


still-gaze

space-dyed

verve

so where were, YOU, 'for a few days'?

i was here.




-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-







wed aug 10

stopgap

so, talk. i'll be here forever in this time
less dribble. one word from you and i am fine.

weightless

eternity is in

in this tiny little bubble.

i can almost see the soundless rim of your hat.

you are a musician, you can transform discarded bits of
this and that

fringed bangs, pom-poms and shiny pendants

or just cut up a solid

propel the turquoise, Amelia ~ you billowy bou
doir of sumptuous softness!

why do you talk to that polyester-fill?

because she is a working sidelight. hey, what are you going to call this?

'LESS'

LOL excellence is not synonymous with perfection

did i tell you that i stopped smoking?

no. but good for you.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.

Just2BClose2U-'no sugar tonite, no sugar to help me rhyme'

Tues., Aug. 9 - 9:30p.m.

I am fighting to keep the demons at bay.

With?

Wellbutrin
AA.
Can/you/just/forgive/me/one/more/time
Mr. Yellow-
Mellow.

~

Hysteria Vid

~

Lackadaisical Loping

Beautiful Hell
all lacustrine

click your answer across the screen
make it sound like an oceanic whisper
maybe call it
Wire Strings in a Case
or
I didn't even miss her

SLOT-

candy

Stol.id

Okay. So what happened?

ulcers. esophagus & stomach

new gentle phase, K? you start.

stereophonic

playa

tube.rose

a spike

ultra violet

charge completed ~



...


I'll be gone for the next couple of days. x

your hair smells like sunshine, today & a note..

.................................................................................





note

the sky, its wide bones; a boulevard. i am painting tiny stars on a shoe. tomorrow i will découpage my tea cup , glass box , lampshade - maybe with poems, maybe not.

Sentimental Code

spin-bird, snap-wire! how have you been?

sober. and, i finally found the prints in the chamber. the
bug is still under a handkerchief, all the shine gone from
its inky,

spoony legs.

and in the garden, where we used to sit,
almost everything has gone to shade.

nah, hoop skirt, lace collar, kitty cat.

hoodwink, hoodoo.

-grin-

hey now, pocket-plus.

plum flush?

taxi, pixel, gotta rush!

À la prochainet..

YOUR LINES..

strewn across my bed ~

I could be trying to sleep
under a ceiling made of
bark, branch and leaf;
freedom vents
allowing the body to finally speak -
white and

slippery
curves
twisting
like a poppy
against your dark
mouth
and
cheek

'folie de doute'

red with arrows
the night pours forth
with mad glory!

1.

-Morning-


I am sitting at the window again
a paperback face
your mouth opens
to kiss


2.

angel feathers
spotted in the smoky drift
a cameo
in last night's dream

dancing to the acoustic version of Layla
like a cause
rising and falling

falling



3.

-postcard-
from your sweetness.
your, like, and is.
your,
completely alone

Get Un dressed & dance the ghost with me. www.the-sisters-of-mercy.com/

Nachtmusik

You wear your red t-shirt like
my fever,

cover your eyes with sun glass..

and

drive, drive, drive.

I wake, only to find more snow has
fallen.


..


Fallen

looks

that

glitter

in

their

shells

..


Shells


&


songs. sung out loud.
spaces, roll by and by

your cursive heart.

the crunch of tires on ice.


Ice

blue. the waitress sets down our steaks. more lemon slices in a plastic cup.
your phone vibrates on the table. tattered cherubs stuck on the wall.

BELL

and she did..

she did see him again and it was odd because on that day she had baked a hen with ooddles of onions and garlic. (she threw the neck & gizzards out.) and the sun was only a white smidge of a smudge. and she was glad she had worn her navy blue, v-neck, Par Four, acrylic sweater, (made in the usa.) .. it was a sort of soft and warm hug that he could not give her, for he had no arms in this place.

UV but no cigs

honey bunches of oats ~

spring in winter ~

I hold on to your lip gloss.
I hold on


to

what is you:

light

in the most

un·ex·pect·ed


.


you are a frame

a flame

a color not of smoke

.

when have I not loved you

(11/01/10 01:21:53)


I have loved you forever - loved you like the moon's soft, silver, leaves - like art, exotic & sightless or rain - wet and glistening on Nina's window pane. I have loved you through your calculated phrases to potential lovers dash or mothers. I have followed you from alleys to mattresses to castles rich with gold and surrounded by snow. I have loved you for a million years. Loved you in gardens, in fountains - loved you through thick and thin. Loved you like a favorite song - like velvet, like cotton - like bare skin. Loved you like a grand piano, like a victorian portrait, framed in silky webs. Loved you when I was a cloud and you were a tree. Loved you when you said, 'I won't judge.' & 'Don't wait for me.' I have loved you in my darkest hour - held the grace of you in my dreams. I have loved you like a white swan in a dark cave - an endearing sonnet, leather and lace. I have loved you like pearls and pearls of skies & eyes - even the shifting of lanes. Love you like Mardi Gras - fog & ghosts. Loved you like the smell of long-ago trains. I have loved you in Paris & Rome - on balconies held up by angels on two legged toes. Loved you like a centipede, a turtle, a troll. I have loved you like falling and being caught - like a roller coaster, like a sling-shot. Loved you in smoky dimensions, barefoot and empty. . loved you - love you.

Die Apokalyptischen Reiter - Eruption

It's So Hard To Keep The Smile From My Face

Others were suppose to meet us at the Gathering Sidewalks

during slow time we
strip billboards
looking for clues
the Welcome Ladies try selling trips
not one human can afford.


once M decided we should explore the L during daylight.
there was a mean bimmer he wanted to steal. I thought he must be talking about a tank but
then he explained
that it was a small vehicle that could fly, could blend into
clouds and hoover.
like a black helicopter? sort of, but more of a flat spin.
what will you give for it? ..a couple of the books.
 Books?! - not THE Books!
maybe just the newer ones, they have no power.
even when the reader is pulled in by the sound bites?
don’t worry about it.
but I was..
I closed my eyes
to drown between his lines
greylight, hitting buildings like blood
a blue sky paraphrased by slush, bits of scale
circulating thru patches of black
sinking deeper, the water a throat
of eyelashes, of ink, torn flesh
moonbitter scars that pop and bulge
the taste of salt soundless
words under words trying to touch
pieces of heaven dotted
with sky, soft as toes in the sand
M and I try to sleep
on the, smothering
comicbook type bunk. we wait for rain,
listen to Vangelis.
recite parts from
The Lady of Shalott & so
the days keep running together.
I develop an eye infection -
M says it’s from the neon dust. .
something about how the colors are poison.

Even when i wear layers of clothing
you make the back of my neck tingle..
are your hands warm?
I smile because everything turns into something else..
there is a naked girl in the box above us-
another in the box below.


*

Later

our bodies are hot on a desk in front of a polished mirror > pure to see - white lace > and starched sheets, chiffon and minutes onwards, convolution-spending >
the it vibrating when we of now, despite our partial partly > I expand him in my pupils.
he’s on it and curious, anytime, to float with the shift > his body to me,
it’s real and everything, flesh moving forwards > on a repeated light spin <
the merry go-rounds > walls. I with a cig, go rounds between sheer curtains with him everywhere, he is my bedroom, > in its Merry- > Wonderfall. > even away, naked, in books >
He’s the same>,wombed, sometimes crazy & stray > I save the naked, go-rounds, reflect,consciously. i don’t know what it means. the repeated can box, wear vibrating tints rosy.
> Wonderfall. repeat me, even if jerk i ly, always, day.. even in his days of curtained silence, I keep these pages hidden on the roof with the cool rain and leaves.

 

T Rex - Mambo Sun

31 Flavours, Day Seven, Harrisham Rhyme

mushroom cap -
moist dew mouth, hand
to your lovely blonde stretch
over my lap,
reaching and
ghosting a sketch.

fluctuation of the pupil

on repeat.

through the cubed window Nina sees a squad car slowly circling the parking lot, the robo driver entering numbers into its box.


too many abandoned vehicles.


yeah.


you gave your laptop a name..


lol. yeah.. 'Dellarina'.


what did the song remind you of?


rain..

hottie singer - blast from the past

a Found Poem (solid block of fuel)

Calling Close on a Stream
flushes any buffered data,
essentially calling Flush
for you.


~*



When deriving from Stream,
if you have an internal byte buffer,
it is strongly recommended
that you override these methods
to access your internal buffer
for substantially better performance.


~*



The thunderstorm rages -
Nina lights another candle
then blows it out.



.

Through the Cubed Window

Nina watches WarmThing sleep.
Curves outlined by silence, lips slightly open.
Hair: a glossy fan of smoothly smooth yet also
coiled, dishevelled & somehow a token. & those
breasts -
pills in the dark.

Nina zooms into the eyes. Into
WarmThing's, dream:


she is with Napkin
they are stacking lawn chairs together


< Is she smiling? >

hey, Yellow Mellow!
yeah, she is laughing.

< Is she wearing a black diamond? >

heh.. yes.

< I'm in too, it's nice, a fuzzy mood and I think that Napkin has probably loved her before. >


you mean, like in another time, YM?


< Maybe .. maybe during the Time of the Moon. >


oh.

by anesthezia, inspired by warmthing & napkin

my nipples are skinny
but when you pull on them
they feel fat

& your kisses have feet
they stand a little shaky but they stand

and make me

feel
like some sort of tiny
mouth-hole

like when i went into yours and it was not so tiny
it was huge and un measured like a song that dark turned and stretched and turned, a sigh;
a shift wanting to stay alone. but
my light is a bit broken so you let me in

6469

Nina touches the keyboard

Solutions to install
No solutions found


just a room held by night

Nina takes a pill, smokes his cigarette. thinks maybe she will buy him a lighter.
someday.

Tags: None

illusion: XIV


never dead me
i police men, so okay take a shower, on for it.

silly chime - party all the time

spoon full -
special is something fix

fifty into just elite

but i happen in immunity. wake W itch, particular the exclamation, but mad - say the speak, the swim. . the I-you refract

dreams best sky rest, -

Maybe. particular in lack


~*

u spit your tragedies into
music. while i eat
artificial crab meat,
drink
rolling rock &


feel beat, a don't million with nobody Quality.


i was so happy, i thought that song, 'Hold On'
by LotusBand
was
free.

it's worth a schedule full, see.


~*




^ this is what i thought when i saw your pic

the one on facehook?


yes.


the silver artifice?

arc): chair the feeling

you happen, Mother, to the brought, the get ..

Print-makers, voltaire's uP ?

^ return potato in 0 is i out but worth something
i have,
dig? ^

an ever-magic; soul mute

Spartan but meschikles?

body-life-thing - narmur)

it's a multidisciplinary heaven

sometimes i want you like a
mad elementary roll

b/m illion of say .. panels of lock: your lips

bleed hip > everybody's in vying artistic, No of don't-slides and fondly,

yours.

Nina Sleeps

the lights move on
faces:sharp noses
tub eyes, the blue knocked
Out
his mouth
an accident
move, she thinks
her hair is good/real:
everything from the ocean
new. & inside her Other
mouth Sweet Candy

~*

listen, when I cut over
Again, I will write & there will be
a rainbow with everYthing Sky, chimes
that catch the wind, snowflakes will pave
the road in soft glitter -
you will come out of the dream, a burst of
coolness ..

better teeth?

your smile will be a Language, never pleading.
the rooms of your days will be smooth and uncluttered


~*

much later: saint twice in pocket

will you to my cave bed now

an absurd notion

the whole day has been absurd

i promise to cackle like jiggy red, i mean, what do i care, sitting in pablo's
no air apartment

quarry,

big lad, all woman, no gaps

maybe my heart is superstitious so go back & spell levitate

you'd algebra me if you could, drive a tracker thru

the reign of the big can

slur bag, synaptic want

cunt

volume fraud, laugh gate

sarcophagi in a well

dice order

complete crash

hilarious

a morning in april

Nina watches the sky shift. The mural is rain. The sprinter has gone out to
flip things back:
TP
cigs
medicine for her ear

the rain does a blur dance
her head feels hot

hey.. are you watching the greys in the mural?

yup. where are u?

my eyes are in your street.

thin pluckings of brown.

clumsy

memory..

whatcha do to your hair?

nothing. it's just dirty.

heh..

a swirl-crawl of mock, dangling cushy, that's what u are, u know.

yeah. but i make you laugh. hope you get your cigs soon. take care.

Nina stares at the blank pad, heart loosened, a bird lost, noise behind the wall.

Pencil and Crayon

in fairy tales
we walk through our snowy world..

don't blink

why?

there are fresh places in your eyes
i want to catch them for the map

heh. watch your step. the snow is deep there where if it were blue it would be green

nina..

yeah?

do you mean, red?




      maybe. i don't know. winter is nice, i do love you ..

like gentle mittens?

 & flip flops

(02/04/10 22:41:33)

Hormel?

i can fuse the cheese into a nacho plate.

Packed individually for freshness...




so, Nina, what's up with your stereo?

sounds alright right now, playin' billy idol.

and fat cat is all good?
no. something happened while i was gone.

don't be afraid.

*

Jealous Guy

i don't like him.

jesus, nina..

i am paging mr yellow mellow

why? he can't do anything.

he can be with us.


***

identified: a security vulnerability

what's up n .. m.. drunk again?


***

no!

***

mmmmmm... click... 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7,


***

fuck


alcohol is legal!

***

get out of the past, nina.

untitled

garlic and chocolate. apples and salt.

keebler club crackers, a little scotch and planters cashews

askew?

i want to have fun with you. i do i do i do!

do you remember the last movie we watched
and if it was really me, that was with you?

i remember your mad mouth
and your sad mouth
too

what about that narrow, dark place i touched
and the window i couldn't really see through?

all i know is
you touched me as if i were a flower
and that should be good enough for you.

lol, warm thing...

you make my heart sing?

yeah and if you want
i'll be the napkin if you be the ring.




*

Nina Laughs

she found her silver purse. it doesn't sparkle but the fringe is fun.

you should have bought the boots

she puts the purse in the closet with the 2 matching scarfs. no palm trees just beautiful cobblestones, a fireplace and snow.

your body is cold

hush.
winter is a vampire

that looks like you

Nina Dreams as

reflections repeat - nights in the duplex box. and through the window:
angels float from another host. . dark, filled with holes, cracks, & smoke.
these holes
fingerprint her with glints
push her into everywhere they've been -
haiku of smoky noise.
her naked body stirs, but only, slightly.

*

far away
tombed in his own dreams
black irises
burn lips, smear themselves on bony & fat tips..

*

basket thighs

how's your cash?

i'm broke

*

Nina is a theater
her bangs & lungs are spray-painted
but
the word
poem,
is etched
like a tunnel -
cross-stitched




&
he is
a pink
automaton
tiny bits of ice stuck in his bit
a vibrating line
marking the gloom
with

forever



*

consider each keystroke ..

a kiss.


*

with bloody cuticles and shaky hands
Nina types into the machine..

dear ghost eyes
i am sorry for calling you mean names. i am sorry you are sad.

know this:

you are my velvety ocean & my dreamland.
my nest & my pulse
my fever, my socket, my
glass. my dark shadow ~

i came across time for you,
died a million deaths with you

ran through alleys &
walked through gardens of stars with you

i won't die

on a foggy
winter
morning
covered by nothing but the computers' flickering glow
the fat cat snoring in her corner
dreaming in rhyme as my avatar changes into some kind of an angel or
snowflake
maybe even a bloody ax in the sand
which would lead people to believe that
i am still here
i guess this is a poem
for all of those who can't stand to breathe
the stench of their own stink
who no longer care enough to
get out of bed
eat
or
find a job
for those who don't feel like editing their drunken
slop of a poem
fuck, u, u know it's that time of the year
for all you losers
watching a tv show about being reconnected
with god
or
a lost family member or something called, hope
for those sick of all the sugary bullshit or just bull
for all those closet billy idol fans
for those who never did any drugs
but were simply born
too slow
for the obese armchair activist
inhaling his third pizza hut pizza
for the girl who thinks she's gonna make it big
by fixing her nose
for the generic shut-in
who only writes about roses
because he has seen all the ugly in the world
and wants to forget
all the Lucilles putting his last dollar in the jukebox
instead of washing baby clothes
for all those who find their last rebel yell
when the sheriff comes with the eviction notice

for the time love left you breathless
on a beach full of sun.

..................................................

Nina Sighs...

pours herself another vodka/red bull
and turns up the volume

'Super Nanny'
what a great show.

.

show over. cigs, gone.

thinks about getting dressed and going outside to see if the car will start.. nah.
searches for 'Even Flow' on Utube instead.

Pearl Jam.. isn't it a decade too soon for them to be hip again?

no.

o, okay.. so you're just gonna be all sullen and bitchy now?

no. i found a pair of long johns and they fit so i am actually quite content.

so, you are getting dressed and you are gonna go out and try to start your car?

no.

alright. just sayin'. just might be good to see if it starts. cause you are gonna have to drive it tomorrow.

i can walk.

LMFAO! yeah, right. in this weather? you aren't as tough as you used to be, Nina. Let's face it, you have pretty much given up.

on what?!

L I F E

fuck you.

..

Radar Love

love is..

us, living in a van by the river..

drinking cheap scotch and screw-top wine

writing mad/bad-ass poems on napkins stolen from McDonald's.

we will film everything, of course, and become friends.

lol come on now, let's get serious!

Love is..
the blinds closed, your wet hair, your pupils all crescent, the clutch
and hold of your sweet talons, and that satin bush wild enough to silk on!

to silk on? oh, you mean after i bang it on your salty lips & tongue?

oh yeah - and the way you paint those lusty arrows on my skin
till i am blind & gutted, reduced to howls; dog language

but what if i want a cigarette and we have none?

i'll let you suck my finger or if you want you can suck your thumb and i won't ever tell anyone.

*~Melancholy~*

Nina wakes
to find him carrying her

beating

heart

to his kymograph/other thing machine thing

his sepia lab coat
has vanished in spots

what are you doing with that?

checking it for a change

why?

don't worry
you'll get it back


~~~

the land stands still, the water keeps rising

both moons, those milky eyes
dissolve into soft focus

Nina is dreaming. her hair a tangle of mischief
blue veins pulsing starfish highlit thighs hand painted
skin

bubble b, where did you wander off to

far away giggle
broken static

just /// beach

are you wearing the repellent

i found a cove full of ***///*

get back to the villa before dark, i'm picking you up in a few hours

foamy shadow - flagged

Nina!



ok // tryin to send [image]


~<~<~<~====~<~<~<~^^~>~>~>~====~>~>~>~

An American Prayer

Nina starts crying at the same time the rain begins to फाल - 10/01/09 11:09:51

not so much out of sadness as from frustration.

she closes the window and gets out the ice.
take that, eyelid 1 and eyelid 2!

frozen swirls of radon on frozen planets of ice?

'forever afternoon (tuesday?)'

the fairy land of love .. i know u are smiling .. i always make u smile with my love

It's smoke only when no
longer visible, everything around
it, shiny, blue, and naked, odd parts I notice and
claim.

lick-spittle of thought, brainwell, shadows of my soul .. imagine it is a blue world's other weather .. rubbed on your knot .. my finger-flower close the blinds, concentrate, u know the vanity of the carnal world. but that is not what i was talking about..

well.. i am talking about the enormous stillness of dream-taste.
a fatal autumnal afternoon.
why fatal?
just a deeper magic. .

the
two-lane highway, recognition?

before the re-pass.

lol


..


your hair smells good.

your lips are soft.

i'll stay.

who will save us now?